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Post by //Cindy// l u n a on Jan 2, 2009 12:41:30 GMT -5
Hunger - it was a sensation that clawed its way through even the deepest misery. It found its way to even the most hidden of cats. It was unstoppable. And in leaf-bare, it was hard to satisfy. So with nothing keeping her going except a complaining stomach and ancient will to survive, Dawn padded silently through the icy forest. She skirted around the fishing hole, but of course the thing was completely frozen over. The fish were not exactly easy to catch when the temperature dropped.
Dawnstorm - or Dawn - didn't even know why she was still insisting on keeping herself in this horror of a life. She kept herself well groomed and healthy, but mostly to avoid anyone asking her if she was alright. She was terrified of having to talk to others, and her phobia had just worsened over the years. She couldn't get out a sentence to any cat in her Clan, and telling trespassers to leave RiverClan land was getting to be nearly impossible as well. But she kept living, kept breathing, and - if possible - kept eating.
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Post by +~MoSsY~+(catsrule) on Jan 9, 2009 16:49:09 GMT -5
ooc: I figured since i have a new cat in riverclan that i should post with him but if you would like someone else to rp with you just tell me k? Besides I know how annoying it is when you make a new thread and it takes a while for people to post in it ^^
Black and white paws padded quietly towards the fishing gorge. Yellow eyes flickered their gaze every way landing on different objects. Thornmoon focused on the rise and fall of his sides as he took breaths. This was something he did when there was nothing else to occupy his far-off mind. He also liked to walk in the direction the wind was blowing on windy days just for the fun. Of course others thought this was odd but they also thought everything he did and said was weird so it didnt matter. He stepped lightly at times and harder at other times, also to occupy himself. Over the moons of straying away from the others in his clan he found that having things to keep yourself out of a bored state helped you from thinking about your faults. A scent filled his nose but he realized that it was just riverclan. He silently wondered who it was and pondered if he should steer clear of them or not. On a random decision he refused to let his paws stray from his current path, if the cat ahead didnt want him near them then they could say something. Eventually he fell into a deep state of thinking becoming only half aware of his surroundings. When he finally snapped out of his thoughts he saw Dawnstorm ahead.
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Post by //Cindy// l u n a on Jan 9, 2009 22:47:37 GMT -5
A rustle - Dawn turned her head a bit and swiveled her ears to try to focus behind her. She was completely still, tensing her muscles. She didn't want to make her presence known. If it was a mouse whose little claws had stuck its paw on snow where he'd expected ice, Dawnstorm wanted to surprise the little morsel. And if it was a cat who had brushed against some little thing, well then Dawn wanted to get away from the danger of conversation. She opened her jaws to taste the air. She smelled the warm, enticing scent of a small rodent. The air was moving around her, but she still couldn't quite tell where the mouse was. So she decided to go with her sense of hearing. She padded around softly, and a movement caught her soft orange gaze. It wasn't a mouse. She opened her mouth, trying to think of a reason that she had to leave, but nothing came out. At least she hadn't squeaked like the mouse she had been looking for. She realized her legs were backing away on their own.
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Post by +~MoSsY~+(catsrule) on Jan 10, 2009 11:48:47 GMT -5
Thornmoon hesitated not wanting to talk with another cat since he knew what most of them thought about him. "Sorry" He murmered trying to back up. Soon he realized that the she-cat was also backing up. His fur turned hot in emberassement, this she-cat was even afraid of him! Otherwise why would she be backing up? At the moment he wasnt in his usual eccentric state of mind, he was in a more normal state so he knew what he usually acted like. Thornmoon's yellow eyes shifted to his paws staring at them as he backed up a few steps. "I didnt mean to interupt whatever you were doing....." he meowed quietly. Talking to this shecat was making him uncomfortable.
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Post by //Cindy// l u n a on Jan 10, 2009 14:16:01 GMT -5
Oh - no. Now Thornmoon was upset. He probably thought it was something about him. She was a bit surprised, actually, that he didn't know her. Maybe no one talked about her. Probably everyone had forgotten about her. If they hadn't, he probably just hadn't realized why she never spoke. Guilt slammed into Dawnstorm, and she knew that she needed to say something so this tom wouldn't be upset. Then she would leave. But what could she say? She searched for an idea for a moment, but she was barely able to form coherent thoughts she was so dreading what she would have to do. "It's n-not you..." Her voice was small and her words felt all wrong in her mouth. "I... uhh. What I mean is..." She trailed off, trembling from tail to nose, unable to continue. If only she hadn't said anything at all.
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Post by +~MoSsY~+(catsrule) on Jan 10, 2009 16:49:54 GMT -5
Thornmoon studied the she-cat more and realized that she never even talked in camp. He noticed that she was trembling. "Oh....I'm such a mousebrain.......I'm sorry Dawnstorm" he meowed softly. He shifted his weight from paw to paw awkwardly. "I didnt realize....I mean I forgot....." Thornmoon sighed. Since he didnt speak to anyone in his clan he had a lot of time to observe the others so really and truly he had no excuse for not remembering. He should've just stayed back at the camp.
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Post by //Cindy// l u n a on Jan 10, 2009 19:26:08 GMT -5
"It... my fault." If she'd been able to blush, she would have been blood red. Every time she tried this is what happened - her embarrassment took over and made her choke on even the simplest of words. When she'd been a kit, she had been quiet. That was all. As an apprentice, she had said few words and developed an antisocial stutter. She had been teased, and that just made her stop talking. As a warrior, she had been forced to talk in front of the a group a few times and since then she had barely been able to form a sentence. She knew that all the other cats thought she was slow in the brain or that StarClan had taken away her ability to speak. That was not the case - her mind was sharp and her voice melodious. She just never demonstrated those qualities anywhere near the rest of her Clan. And of course Thornmoon had known and simply forgotten. Everyone knew who she was. Dawn was certain that they talked about how stupid and afraid she was. And now Thornmoon would tell this newest story of her idiocy, her fear of others. She pictured them all laughing, wondering why she stayed in a Clan and assuming that it was out self-preservation not a deep loyalty and jealousy that bound her to the more social members of RiverClan. No one knew her, and there was no way for that to change. And poor Thornmoon, now he would have to try to make her calm down. "You don't..." And Dawnstorm trailed off, not sure where she was going with that and realizing that it made no sense. Keep your mouth shut! she told herself harshly.
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Post by +~MoSsY~+(catsrule) on Jan 10, 2009 20:11:49 GMT -5
Thornmoon watched her silently. He knew that he should just turn and leave so Dawnstorm could have some peace and quiet but he felt bad for forgetting. "I dont what......?" he asked absently in a quiet voice. He let himself slip into his thoughts. When he was a kit he used to tell others about his odd thoughts and ideas but as time passed he realized that this had made them think he was crazy. Of course Thornmoon knew that he wasnt very sane but he wasnt completly crazy, he hoped. "I......" he ended the sentence quickly not knowing what he was going to say. Thornmoon wondered if Dawnstorm knew how he acted. His gaze flickered towards the shecat and then away. He swallowed nervously. Since he hadnt had to start a conversation in a while it was hard to talk to Dawnstorm. "I should go" Thornmoon murmered.
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Post by //Cindy// l u n a on Jan 15, 2009 18:48:55 GMT -5
Dawn wanted to climb up the tallest tree she could find and walk off a branch into the air. She wanted to dive into a river and not surface. This was all her life ever was - failing at conversation, making others miserable, shifting her paws through awkward silences, running away from her Clanmates. That was all she would ever do. Was a life like this worth living? But she knew perfectly well that she would be just as able to end her depression as she was able to start a conversation. In both situations, her body took control and ducked out on her.
"Umm..." She wanted to say something to make everything better, but instead her legs captured her and she couldn't stop herself - she was turning, trotting away, now running, now the trees were flying behind her as her paws covered the ground. She had no choice - she was gone.
ooc; that's all, I suppose.
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